Kiddie Mind Control....

I should have known that yesterday would be one of those days....the air was feeling a little funny....they always come when the air is funny....who you ask??....Who appears at your door at the most inopportune times???? Who stands and delivers a message that many find too hard to say NO too???....You guessed it....solicitors of the pee-wee kind......

They must have known that Juice is gone for an extended amount of time....I truly believe that after being rejected time and time again by him....and he's great at letting them down....some of my favorites are.....when the child selling the Christmas wrapping paper came by....he was Jewish....When the girl scouts came by with cookies....he's allergic to cookies ..(I was mad at that one)....When the kids came by with magazines to sell....he couldn't read.....I tell him God doesn't look fondly on lying...especially to kids.....then I realize....if he didn't tell the lies....he couldn't say No either....sucker....

I swear...they now scope out the house....and come only when they realize he isn't home....damn, damn....double damn.....

At least when I had a career outside of the home...most weekdays were freebies for me and Juice...and the only thing greeting those little imps would be Three wet noses and 12 paws....ha...I bet even they wouldn't say no...especially if treats or pets were involved.....suckers..

So yesterday....they must have known I'd be at my most vulnerable....I was babysitting one of Pooh's little friends for a few hours....his daddy is also deployed right now....and his mom really needed a few hours just to get some work done....heck...I know how hard it is...and us military mommies have to stick together.....

So...after a very eventful...very messy lunch....there was the knock on the door....silly me...I thought perhaps Kekito's mom had decided to come back early...so I didn't check first....not that it would have helped...we have a huge window in the front door....doesn't really allow for covert spying....and really, I'm not the type to go turn out all the lights...and hide in the closet around the corner....heck they could probably hear the babies anyway and know I was in there....

So I answer it....

And who was at the door....but them.....two cutie patooties....all bundled up....looking up with their big eyes...."excuse me ma'am, but we are trying to raise money for our local...blah blah blah....I tune out at this point...because I am trying to grasp at any excuse to say no....but for some reason...that is far beyond me....I couldn't find anything.....

I swear they have some sort of mind control powers....because before I knew it....I had the checkbook in hand....and was writing one out for a full years subscription to Women's Health magazine....I don't even remember turning around and grabbing it....see...they really do have super powers....

Damn....why couldn't it be the girl scouts....at least those cookies are something I do look forward too....

"Thanks".....as they pocket my check.....you have no idea how I wish I could have said...oh wait....no....give me that back....but too late...they were headed off to the next house....to use their super powers on some other unsuspecting fool....

So now, I'll wait patiently for my magazine....which luckily is something I really should read....hopefully it will help me get these last 15 lbs of baby weight off...so it's not a complete waste...like the big tubs of popcorn.....or the twelve rolls of Christmas wrap....that you don't need....but somehow end up with....damn mind control.....wish I could learn it when I want daddy to buy me something I want....oh wait....I do have mind control powers...wink wink......

Sigh......maybe next time I'll be able to say NO.....such a small word....and so easy....

Or maybe I'll just say..."I can't read"....I think daddy may be on to something.....