Wednesday, March 4, 2009

A Pregnancy Life Crisis....


Oh yes....you have read correctly.....and I know that it has to be pregnancy induced....because lord knows I am not this neurotic when I am sans baby......


With Pooh....I had my moments of OCD....ADD....ADHD.....PMS.....(Pregnancy Mental Syndrome).....but I also had longs stretches of clarity and peace....maybe it was having to focus on making a profit that helped me not need a date with Dr Phil.....


I can honestly say though that this time.....I have jumped the precipise....and landed smack in I don't have a freaking clue....


Now...before you all start thinking I am in need of some serious psychological help....I have not reached Britney Spears level by shaving my head, wearing awful pink wigs...driving around aimlessly for hours with my starbucks and a member of the Papparrazi.....(I don't have the time or the money....)


But here are some great examples as to why I feel I am definitely in the midst of some sort of Pregnancy Life Crisis


1. I have decided that in the next few years I want to become a teacher, go to real estate school, open my own childrens boutique, become a wedding coordinator, become an antique appraiser and possibly a hair dresser.....and it's only Wednesday


2. While Watching the Season Finale of the Bachelor... Men = Dung Beetles.....and even though Juice was so self sacrificing by watching the whole 3 hours with me.....I still threw him under the bus and lumped him in there too.....Jerk wads....(sorry honey)


3. Have had numerous arguments with myself over trivial things....and even went so far as to use hand gestures to illustrate a point....to myself.....strangely enough....I always won.


4. My normally talkative self....has had an almost phobia of anything phone related.....I don't answer calls....I don't call back....I don't want to talk more than a couple of minutes....I am anti phone....(even Juice thinks this is strange)


5. My domestic Diva.....has left me a note saying she is going to Aruba for a vacation.....for I don't know how long.....not sure if it's me...or the weather...but since her departure....my house is in absolute chaos...okay maybe not that bad...but it's not up to snuff.....


6. now if that ain't what you call strange....how bout my super lovey dovey....extra sweet husband....knowing that D.D has flown the coup....comes home from work everyday and proceeds to do the chores that I have so lazily not done.....and instead of being endearing and grateful....I bring out my inner Joan Crawford because it makes me feel like he doesn't think I'm doing a good job....(I'm sure that is a run on sentence.....but what the hell)



Now I'm not sure if there is a support group for ladies like myself....but I think i might add that to my list of new career moves...and create one....right in between wedding coordinator....and hair dresser....



Since I"m not cleaning....I have all this extra time.....


help?!?

34 comments:

The Me/ The Wife/ The Mom said...

ROFLMAO! - You know the one about your sweet husband coming home an doing all the chores you were going to do and then you berate him for it because he's really saying that you are a bad housewife?

(raising my hand) I did that...err..I still do that.

All of your points are well within your hormonal state! You are doing just fine! Make sure you get extra sleep when/if your little guy sleeps!

Congrats again! This is so exciting!

April said...

Girl.....just enjoy it!

Life will somehow be back to normal after the second baby....it's the third one that brings the house down! LOL

Lisa @ Boondock Ramblings said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog, first. Second, hormones whack us right out, don't they?! Wow! You are cracking me up, though, so at least that hasn't left you! I was all over the map when I was pregnant with the first. God help us if we get preggars again! Hubby will have to take shelter somewhere! Love your blog! I'm adding you to my reader and hope to keep up more often.

Unknown said...

You can do anything in life you want to...

and then you have another baby. ;)

Pat said...

you are too funny! note that I did shave my head the other day...chaneling Brit..but in my defense I just had a baby ..5 months ago.

Roxane said...

Aww at least you have a reason for your "life crisis". If anyone gives you a hard time, remind them that you are too busy creating a human to listen to their crap!

Lindsey said...

You're too funny!! It's nice that Juice is helping you around the house. :) I'm sure things will level out hormonally soon...Just think, at this stage in my pregnancy I was screaming at people in the walmart and questioning unsuspecting diners at a restaurant why they were talking about me....gotta love pregnancy. :) Our poor husbands......

Anonymous said...

That is so funny! I just had baby number two and I was the SAME WAY!!! It was like, I started to feel trapped or something. I decided to go to broadcasting school, get a graduate degree, become a counselor, start a nonprofit all in like two weeks. I sent off for brochures and went to open houses. I called my contacts and set up dinners...and never followed up!!! I was a mess!!!
And also the same thing with the chores. I didn't do them and when he did, instead of taking it like he was helping me, I took it as a judgement on me for not doing them. CRAZY!!!
If it's any consolation, it passes....sort of!!!

Dawn Parsons Smith said...

Now you've got me completely freaking out! I do all that stuff and I had my dang tubes tied 6 years ago! I hope they didn't come untied!!!!

Flippin' hilarious post as usual! I love coming to visit you! (I'll come clean your house, sweetie...don't you worry about a thing!)

Mom! Dude! said...

LOL! You're funny...what's not funny is that I get that way on almost any given day of the week or month, and I'm NOT pregnant!

Keep on keepin' on!

Gretchen said...

You're pretty great in my book. Don't worry - you'll sort yourself out eventually.

Hope that DD comes back soon! She can scrub toilets with a tan, right?

Nana said...

If you hurry you can become a hair dresser before the baby is born.

Green said...

lol!!
my hubby watched the bachelor with me too. Poor guy!
Hormones are wonderful, aren't they!

Green said...

oh clicky, clicky :)

Carolyn Jess-Cooke said...

Congratulations! Wonderful news - and you know all that crazy stuff passes... Really pleased for you, hope you get some sleep
xxx

Sarah said...

Visiting from SITS!
Yikes! You are too funny!
I had that anti-talk thing during my 2nd pregnancy, I wouldn't answer the phone. EVER.

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Nicole O'Dell said...

You'll make it...I know how you feel, though!

And, it won't hurt hubby to do some chores. LOL @ you getting mad at him about it--been there!

Green said...

clicky

I am Harriet said...

Hi.
Just stopping by via SITS.
Have a great day!

Jaden Paige said...

I think it is all perfectly normal!


And even if it isn't.... you can totally blame it on the hormones. That's one of the good things about being preggo :)

Unknown said...

You're too funny... I still get very anti-talk on some days, I used to blame it on me being on the phone all day at work, but that excuse doesn't fly around here.
It'll be ok - you're just taking a ride on the hormonal roller coaster!! :)

Molly Anne said...

Oh my goodness this is a great post - hilarious. Not that your befuddlement is in any way amusing to me! It's the writing style, the writing style I tell you! okay just didn't want to wake up Joan Crawford there. :)

#4 sounds like me all the time! I hate phone!

Crista said...

Congrats and yes, I was neurotic during both pregnancies! haha

kel said...

I so do that to my hubs!! that's hilarious! I remember that hormonal stuff!

Jeauxdi said...

~*giggle*~ You are SOOOO allowed to act any way you like to! You are with child my love! Enjoy it...Relax, be lazy, you will not have time for thia after the baby is here!
Please NEVER talk about yourslef in the same sentence as BS! Us Louisianians are just SOOO proud of her...Let me tell ya! Ewwwww!
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the Lucy pic...I'm SUCH a Lucy! If we lived close, we would be in all kinds of trouble! HEHE!
If I was close I would clean house for ya, complain about the bachelor JERK! Answer the phone and make calls for you, all while you reach ALL your career goals in time for baby to arrive!
Take care of you and like I said rest while you can...Enjoy your weekend! XOXO

SPITsisters said...

I have all of your same symptoms...and I'm not pregnant! Yikes what does that make me... :) Hahaha, great post.

Tiffany said...

Sounds like pregnancy to me. My favorite is talking to yourself and using your hands!

Unknown said...

i am with SpitSisters, I have no excuse!

Barely Domestic Mama said...

Thanks for the laugh this morning. I believe you are licensed to feel this way while you are growing a human being inside you. Everyone will excuse you because your pregnant.

Aunt Spicy said...

...It looks like all my thoughts were covered in all the other comments ;) So I will only say you rock! Keep doing what you are doing and thanks for being so honest!

Aubrey said...

LOL
You had me rolling on the floor as soon as I read #1! Really though, I'm not laughing at you.

Hang in there! This too shall pass!

Evolving Mommy Catherine said...

Yup, that is definitely a pregnancy life crisis your having. Is it bad that I am not pregnant and I seem to behaving all the same symptoms?

Tammigirl said...

I do number three all the time. Pay me no mind. Really. Just don't ignore me, please. :)

My poor husband, bless his heart.

My husband will cook for us and then I feel guilty so instead of being really sweet about it I try to sort of ignore the fact he did it. I mean I eat... I'm not that dumb. But I don't make a big deal out of it like I probably should.

After I had my second baby I took a banking course. I have no idea why.